Grief is a natural human emotion felt from losing a loved one. It can be overwhelming and confusing, altering one’s life significantly. Data shows that 57% of people have lost a loved one in the last three years, causing them to feel alone and uncertain. If you know someone who has recently been bereaved and want to be there for them beyond funeral planning alone, here are three helpful suggestions worth considering.
Be present
Being present is one of the most meaningful ways to support a bereaved person. Showing up and offering your genuine presence makes them feel heard and understood. Listening attentively without judgment creates a safe space for them to express their emotions. Remember, listening is not about finding solutions but providing comfort through understanding. Sometimes, all they need is your presence and nothing more. You may feel compelled to speak or start a conversation, but it may not be welcome. One way to do this is to start small talk; if they aren't saying much, you can just be with them in their silence. When a grieving person is finally ready to open up, they will let you know.
Offer practical assistance
In times of grief, daily tasks can become burdensome for mourning persons. Preparing meals, running errands, or taking charge of household chores, can be immensely helpful. Taking care of these responsibilities alleviates some of their stress and gives them much-needed time and space to heal. In other situations, your assistance may be key in the final send-off. You may be required or requested to help find funeral services for the grieving family. Instead of picking anyone from the internet, assessing the specific packages offered is better. Every bereaved family has different expectations and requirements, which are the two things to be guided by. However, avoiding using your discretion to select a package is advisable when you haven't consulted the grieving person.
Validate their emotions
Grief is a complex and deeply personal journey, and it is crucial to acknowledge and validate the emotions experienced by the bereaved person. Avoid dismissing or belittling their feelings by telling them the grief will improve with time. When supporting a grieving person, it's important to encourage them to openly express their emotions. Let them know it's normal and healthy to experience a wide range of feelings during this challenging period. Sometimes, finding the right words to say can be challenging, and that's okay. In such moments, choose your words carefully, as the last thing you want is to say something insensitive. Validating someone's emotions means you have acknowledged their feelings as genuine and understandable. Instead of dismissing them, create a safe space where they will feel comfortable talking to you without fear of judgment.
Unmanaged grief can escalate and trigger depression if a person has a history of mental health issues. While you may not be an expert, knowing some signs is important. The above tips can help you actively support a grieving person, but remember to do everything at their pace so they don’t feel overwhelmed.